December 2008

You can run, but you can’t hide

I knew it was coming. I knew it would not be long. I KNEW I could not go more than a year before it happened(que Jaws theme music)….the EAR INFECTION!! In our house, no two words together have caused more sleepless nights(everyone), snotty noses(kids), fever(kids) and tears(mostly mine). Kate has been diagnosed with her very first ear infection…and it only took 13 months. On the whole, that actually isn’t bad since it seemed like Max had one every three months for almost two years….he just CAN’T go easy on me can he? We were in beautiful, sunny Palm Springs for Christmas, but nary a sun ray to be had nor a palm tree to be seen since both kiddos came down with head colds as soon as their feet touched California land….I think they may be allergic, but I’m no doctor. So we spent most of our “vacation” running back and forth to CVS and stocking up on the local delicacies(since you can’t just get everything in one stupid trip) such as: Mucinex(Grape AND Cherry), Sudafed(even though the FDA has CLEARLY banned if for six years and under, but what the hell do they know….she says defiantly), humidifiers(two…one for each kid), Benadryl(because I’m not above drugging a baby to get some sleep!) and a very cheap, large bottle of wine for mommy. Needless to say my husband and I were dreading the flight back, and we were not disappointed. Let’s just say that bad things were said, food was thrown, hands flew and screaming emanated from everyone’s mouths. I even think Max let out a curse word somewhere, but I cannot be sure. But, we made it back to Texas safely, if not a wee bit humiliated and traumatized. First thing this morning, I called Doc Scott and I am about to go pick up BOTH of their antibiotics since they both have ear infections. Max is handling his very well…he’s the ole’ pro. Kate, on the other hand, has seen better days. She’s tired, misty eyed and probably wondering what the hell happened to the right side of her head. I too am tired, misty eyed and wondering what the hell happened to my entire face!

Voulez-vou l’eau avec bubbles ou sans bubbles….

Okay, you’ll have to pardon my French…it’s been a VERY long time since I had to write or speak it, and even then I sucked pretty bad! I actually liked it in high school, but then I had this aweful professor in college that ruined it for me. He spoke French with an Albanian accent, so it sounded like a cross between French and German….where’s the romance in that? Plus, he was always droning on and on about how the French were bigots and racists towards the Albanians, and drove them out of the country, blah, blah, blah. It didn’t help that the class was from 7-9 pm on THURSDAY nights. Any fellow collegiates understand what that means? Yes, THURSDAY nights were the big nights to go out and par-tay! BUT, that is neither here nor there.
Emily…why IS this post titled “Voulez-vou l’eau avec bubbles ou sans bubbles,” you wonder? Well, roughly translated it means “Would you like the water with or without fizz.” I heard this a lot when I visited France a few years ago. In every restaurant we ate, that was the standard question when ordering water. Sooooo what do a French waiter, Emily and meal time at the Roberts houshold have in common? Easy. I feel like a freakin’ French waiter every time I go to serve my 1 year old daughter, who is now lovingly referred to as “Miss Diva Thang.” Don’t get me wrong. She is a fantastic eater, which is way more than I can say for Miggity Max Daddy…the only thing green he liked to eat were his boogies. HAHAHA! No, she’s picky about her drinks. There will be no apple juice or grape juice or even water in THIS house. Nooooo, that would be way too convenient and cost effective. Miss Diva Thang requires her drinks to be FLAVORED water; specifically, Gerber Fruit Splashers. And no, she will not drink it straight from the refrigerator….but she will require it to be warmed to perfection in the microwave. I’ve finally gotten the exact drink/time ratio down-five ounces of flavored water to 18 seconds makes it the perfect temperature for my little angel. Why oh why did I let it get this far? Because I’m a sucker that’s why…what else can I say? I’ve created a petite, particular little monster. However, she’s also a very persuasive little devil…she launched a full-blown drink strike a few months ago where she refused all juices. So, until the day comes where she can get her own drinks and warm them in her own microwave, I’ll just have to keep serving her the way she wants it done…”Avec arome de fruits mon petite princesse?”…..Oh, and she also has to have her food warmed to the perfect temperature as well, but that’s a post for another day:)